Relation-ships have been a rich and theatrical show ground in the waves of my life. During the stay in my mother’s womb, I had my first dramatic moment when my mother was set on jumping out of a moving vehicle if my father did not marry her. How’s that for a start? I wonder what the word would be for one who is conceived by an unmarried woman? Would “mastard” be most appropriate?
That was the initiation of a journey towards mastering the art of relationships. The years to follow would bring thrills and chills of moments and experiences filled with shakings and awakenings, lessons and insights, people and spaces, tools and guidance on the inner workings of relating. Seeing through the mirage of relationships can ultimately open you to the soul and breadth of relating.
Dictionary.com defines relationships as: a connection, association or involvement; connection between persons by blood or marriage; an emotional or other connection between people, i.e. between teachers and students; a sexual involvement; affair. Based on the diverse meanings of the word relationship we are constantly creating and forming relationships throughout any given day. This means that from the moment you develop an emotional response toward someone – whether it’s the anger you feel when you are cut off in traffic or the emotions that surfaces at the first introduction to someone you like or don’t like – a relationship is established once you respond internally. Short or long lived it matters not.
My question then is if we are forming so many relationships how does that affect us mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually? What comes to mind is isn’t it important to our well being that we form ties that strengthen and empower us rather than deplete our resources and destroy our peace of mind? 분당스웨디시
Relationships (particularly intimate ones) are one of the most talked about and pursued areas of our human lives. Some women panic as they age and wake up each morning without a significant other while men continue to be in the dark at understanding and relating to the opposite sex. A native Washingtonian woman declared a fast for creating her ultimate relationship saying, “The fast is focused on the manifestation of marriage/motherhood and releasing any remaining blockages of mine.”
A divorced father living in Zurich believes, “Today it’s not so easy to have a relationship… most want to stay leader or want just to slave the other.” While a single man from the West coast of the US believes that, “Relationships generally define themselves.” Why so I asked? Is it because people are not actively participating, defining and building solid and meaningful relationships and as a result relationships are taking shapes and forms on their own?
The art of relating has never been important enough to merit a place in the curriculum of the scholarly world. It’s no wonder intellectuals and many teachers of our school aged children still know little about relating. Shouldn’t this be a focus at the onset of life? For the most part people are living without consciously relating with each other. This is evident in global wars, the high rates of divorce and school drop-outs.
My exploration uncovered that people are definitely searching but are generally looking in the wrong direction. Some were not clear on the designs of their relationships and others were pretty extensive and wordy in defining a relationship and laying the perimeters.
How do you relate with the YOU or with the “I” that you are? Do I trust myself? Do I like myself? Do I understand myself? Do I listen to myself? Do I know my needs? How do I feel about myself? These are key questions. And no doubt these are the building blocks for relating harmoniously and understandably with others. Answers to the above questions can often be found in our patterns of relating with others. With each relationship as a mirror reflecting some aspect of our character, we are then portraits and manifestations of one another.